to never not, not be

Been up all night long

Staring at nothing for far too long

It’s nearly seven AM, what a gem it might be to see the sunrise..

That’s not really what I’m thinking of

Surfacing coherency would be lovely.

If I could crack a whip on my thoughts

And not let their forward motion quit

Then surely I could never not

Be sitting here writing this old shit,

But here I am again, it seems-

Thoughts consumed by mindless dreams

Which could never not, not be, never not, not be

Gone?

Silent Song of Longing

Open your mouth. Speak. Give me something to work with. A hook. A nod. Something I can live with. I'm here for the taking. But you're barely waking up. I have a life to live, and so much to give you, if you'd only open up and Speak.

I have stolen eternity in just a moment. I feel her power and it’s a torment. I cannot carry this alone it must be returned. Unless I grow another heart or my love is earned. So why don’t you rise up to meet me? Why don’t you take this road by my side? Tell me if you’re scared and I’ll be with you. But it seems right now I’m alone on this ride.

too bad

too often i awake

and feel reality is never

where i thought it was

when my dreams that i

hardly remember are more

comforting than whatever this is

it's too bad that i shut

myself away whenever

this shit happens

it's too bad

it's pretty sad

but someday i'll wake up

and won't feel so alone

i'll also get up

and not feel so old

i'll look to the sun and

know that you can see it too

it's true

and i love you

it's true, i love you

it's time to realize the

facts of the situation

over here

let's not be fooled by none

especially ourselves

let's just take it slow

one day at a time

and we'll get by

we'll be fine

then we'll get gone

sail away on some idea that

won't fade away

get lost on some ship or other

we won't need another body around

cuz i'll never drown with you

i know i'll never be found

without you

so come on and give us

that face with the name

that i love

but you can go whenever you want to

you can be whoever you fancy

you can do all that you can find a way to

i just hope that along your way you'll

find me again

oh, do you think you can find me again

on this island?

if not, too bad

if not, it's not so sad

because i know you'll never go away

from here (my heart)

Amber

Everythins moving around in a groove and looking at me. The words on the page lose their pre-prescribed meaning as they rearrange and relate to other words that have come alive. So all I do? my part is just to observe before the fall.

2012

i got my blanket back

i got my blanket back

but 2 souls are taken

2 more are gone

i could have known them

i could have shared

but i just close back up

close back up and dig a hole

to hide in

time is provoked

time is lost

given to the poor?

no, just wasted away

what is with the mindset

of this generation

not losing but wasting and on repeat?

what would our parents say

if they really cared?

what would our parents say

with their arms crossed, jaw barred?

what would our parents say

to us, the ones who had it all to spare?

were we really ever truly aware of what we had?

we must press on

we will move on

but we will never trespass on

forgetting each other

so much to build on

so much to grow on

nothing will break this strong

family apart

we have too much heart

we'll go so far together

alone together,

together alone

as long as we we realize there's something, something irreplaceable

that we own

something we always have shown

in our fortress of make-believe,

but never to be confused with

a make-believe fortress

there's always more to add

there's always more to say

but all good things must come to an end

Tearing

Have you ever had tears travel over you nose

Passing a crossroads on the map of your face

A message from the eyes, the portals of the soul

Looking for and running from a private embrace

Did you ever feel one thing and say another

Just to please the general atmosphere

A quiet thing that maddeningly pierces the truth within

As you are torn between roars or tears

.

.

.

DEAR WHOEVERYOUTRULYARE:

MUST I HAVE AN AUDIENCE FOR MY OWN EMOTION?

I'M SEARCHING FOR A FERTILE IMAGINATION, A NOTION

SO UNLESS YOU, THERE IN THAT SEAT

ARE WILLING TO LIVE IN THIS WILD HEAT

I DON'T WANT YOUR DISORIENTED PITY AND STARES

YOU DON'T KNOW ME. SO WHO FUCKING CARES

My thoughts are congealed, never known
Unless I choose to let them out…
Alone together or Together alone?
Maybe one day We’ll have it figured out